4 more weeks

I am so excited this is the last month of pregnancy, the last pregnancy, and last baby I'll be bringing home. I have been so busy with all that has happened in our lives (job loss, homeschool, taking care of our two children and new puppy) that I really haven't had time to sit and really enjoy being pregnant like I did with Brendan and Trinity. Now it's hitting me-4 weeks left!! Maybe it's catching a cold or seeing that my doctors visits are now every week...I don't know but I am getting excited and nervous at the same time. How am I going to handle three children (I still don't know how my parents did it with three girls), homeschooling a 3rd grader and all the care that comes with a three year old and infant. Oh yeah and a puppy who acts like an infant. I wonder what in the world was I thinking as I prayed to God asking for one more chance at this. I wonder how am I going to be a good mother when daily I struggle with my temper and snarky remarks. I wonder how in the world would God allow this to happen when I still suffer from the annoying fibromyalgia, IC, and endomteriosis. And of course there's the vanity...I've gained over 50lbs with this pregnancy!! Wow, how will I ever get all this weight off after I have baby Annaliese!

Then I remember I can freak out or reach up to my Father who can take all this weight off my shoulders. I can pray everytime I have a panic attack about being a godly mother, wife, and yes wanting to be a hotty wife. I can trust He hears me and cares about my silly worries and craziness that goes on in my head. It's just another reason I thank God for sending His Son for me, my beautiful children, my incredible husband...for everyone. When I feel alone I can rest assured that I'm not and he's listening.